Luke turns 12 tomorrow. 12 years ago on this day blah blah blah. How many of these stories do people even read? I wonder if anyone will read my blog when I am dead. Will it even be areound? I see this big mega blogger computer somewhere holding all my memories, pictures, jokes and stories exploding and evrything is gone. The blogger guys and the LJ guys are tired of the fight and too lazy to start over, so my Lucas birth story and all its fluff is gone and lost in cyber space forever.
Fine.
Here is how it went down: I was huge. It had been a long, hot summer and I had been on bedrest for the better part of 6 months. My OB finally said the he felt it would be best to start me on pitocin and get the ball rolling. So I show up at 5:00 a.m. on September 25, change into my butt gown and proceed to get IVed. Multiple stes of fingers checking out my junk during a long wait for something to happen. There was this rediculous belt with some kind of speaker they insisted I wear, but Luke was too busy swimming around to allow such nonsense to go on and no reliable hearbeat could be elicited. There was a lot of TV watching and waiting. I had cramps that were very much like a mild period, but nothing worth telling anyone about. Lunch hour came and went , more TV, more boredom. Early evening came and my doctor decided to try and put a clip thing on the baby to get a reliable heartbeat and proceed with more drugs. When he did that, my waters broke. A lot. As soon as the nurses got me cleaned up, they would break again and one nurse mentioned she had never seen so much fluid. No one told me why, but I can assume it had to do with the edema and toximia. Soon after, I started to really hurt. This being the first one, I had no real knowledge of what to expect other than my mom telling me "it was a happy hurt," so when it progressed to severe menstral cramp stage, I wanted drugs.
Ugh, what a friggin weiner. I wasn't even having decent contractions when getting that stupid epidural. I had no idea. Lets not even discuss how much the epidural hurt going in. Oh my GOD! It felt like this deep, massive shooting intense pain from where the needle went in up into the back of my neck and base of my skull. I struggled with the choice of crying out or throwing up. I ended up just crying. After it was all over, they lay me down and started the drip. Ahhh. I remember it felt cold and I was numb from just under my boobs down to my feet; unfortunately, I was also paralized and was unable to change positions on my own. I could feel pressure and a certian discomfort when laying in one position too long, but was completelly helpless to move. The drip would run out and a nurse would have to call the anesthesiologist to bring me more. Evidently, the nurses werent allowed to administer the drug and the anesthesiologist would have to be called in from home every 2 hours. When I ran out, I went from no pain to hard contractions for about 30 to 40 minutes or however long it took the anesthesilogist to show up, then no pain again until I ran out. We went through this 3 times before my doctor came in telling me it was time to have a baby. I had no clue. My body was completely shut down and I felt nothing. It was a very long time before I finally got the hang of what I was doing and pushed down.
Curt and my doc were down in between my legs like footballers in a huddle.
DOC: The baby is crowning.
Curt: The baby is crowning!
Doc: Push, push push...deep breath...push push push
Curt: Push Jess! Push! PUsh!
Me: I feel like im going to pass out. It is true, I had no idea how to breathe and was holding my breath in between pushes and fading fast.
I got some oxygen and kept on pushing against nothing. I could feel a certain amount of pain, but there was no real urge and I was not doing as well as I could. At some point I threw up on Curtis' arm. Finally, I felt the need for one good hard push and my Noosie came out with a gush dark brown hair and pee shooting right out out of his little noodle. Curt was crying, I was freezing to death and bleeding. I was unable to push out my placenta. The urge was gone and Curtis said it looked like I was peeing blood. This was when I got the first taste of manual expulsion. OH. MY. WORD. It hurt so much. I can't even describe it and I said to myself I would never, EVER have another baby ever.
There was some vitamin K to help stop the bleeding, which made me very hot and vomit. It took 3 days to regain the use of my legs after the epidural. I've been told that it should not have been that bad and the paralized limbs were very unusual. But, after it was all over, I had this perfect little boy with a perfect little face, and tiny little hands. He was beautiful and everything I had gone though was worth it and some.
so there it is. The excessively unromatic birthing story for Lucas James Edwards. Named for my stillborn brother Lucas James Rosen, who would be 36 this year if he would have lived. Lucas calls him his special angel and I think he is right.
Happy birthday Noosie. You are still the best boy in the world.
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